Ah, young people. You’re the future, they say. But let’s be honest, the future looks a lot like the present—full of politician uncles and aunties living their best lives while you’re stuck wondering how to pay your bills. Don’t worry, though! It’s time to stop dreaming small and start thinking big. After all, if you can’t beat them, join them. Here’s how to succeed like your favorite political family:
Step 1: Ask the Right Questions
Next time you meet a politician uncle or aunty, don’t just ask, “How are you?” That’s boring. Instead, ask, “Uncle, how did you afford that luxury car on a government salary?” or “Aunty, how did your son start a multi-crore business right after college?” Be polite, of course. Smile. Nod. And take notes. This is your masterclass in creative wealth-building.
Step 2: Think Rich, Act Rich
Politicians don’t just think rich—they act rich. Notice how they always have the latest phones, the biggest houses, and the shiniest watches? That’s not luck. That’s strategy. Start small. Buy a fancy pen. Carry a leather bag. Pretend you’re already successful. Fake it till you make it—or till you find a way to make it without actually working too hard.
Step 3: Family First (But Only If They’re in Power)
Politician families are all about teamwork. Dad becomes a minister, mom gets a fancy government job, and the kids? Oh, they’re CEOs by age 25. It’s a family business, really. So, if your family isn’t in politics yet, what are you even doing? Convince your parents to run for office. Or better yet, run yourself. Who needs experience when you have confidence?
Step 4: Master the Art of Promises
Politicians are experts at promising things they’ll never deliver. Jobs for everyone! Free electricity! A corruption-free country! Learn from them. Promise your friends you’ll start a business, your parents you’ll get a job, and yourself you’ll save money. Will you do any of it? Probably not. But hey, it’s the thought that counts.
Step 5: Never Explain, Never Apologize
This is the golden rule. Did your bank account suddenly grow? Don’t explain. Did your business magically get a government contract? Don’t apologize. Politician uncles and aunties never do. They just smile, wave, and move on. You should too. Confidence is key.
Step 6: Grow Like a Politician
Finally, remember: growth isn’t about hard work. It’s about smart work. Why spend years studying when you can just… you know, know the right people? Why start from the bottom when you can start from the top? Politicians didn’t get where they are by following the rules. They made their own rules. And so can you.
The Dream is Real
So, young people, it’s time to wake up and smell the opportunity. Stop worrying about degrees, jobs, and savings. Start thinking like a politician. After all, if they can do it, why can’t you? Sure, it might take a little creativity, a few connections, and maybe a questionable decision or two. But hey, that’s the price of success, right?
Now go out there and make your politician uncles and aunties proud. Or better yet, make them nervous. The future is yours—just make sure it’s as shiny as theirs.
Disclaimer: This article might make you THINK. Please don’t actually try this at home. Or do. Who we are to stop you?
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